Look Out History, Jim Bob Discovered “Find And Replace.”
Somewhere in the quiet hollers of Tennessee history is being made…up.
I saw this coming last week when a publishing house decided they would get better sales of Huck Finn if they rewrote it to reflect our modern sensitivity to the truth.
Just hit “ctrl f” on the keyboard, enter the word you wish to remove, then enter the word you wish to exchange for the offending word or passage and hit the enter key.
Almost instantly 219 offensive words are replaced with something more appealing to the modern palate, just print it and you’ve changed history, straightened out the present and saved the republic.
This works as well for paragraphs, passages, even chapters. Bad actors disappear and are replaced with more agreeable characters, unfortunate events, years, decades, entire centuries swapped for happy days.
If there were a hierarchy of states, as there should be, can any one argue that our national hall monitor or crossing guard should not be chosen from among Tennessee, Arizona or Texas?
Truly, they are at the vanguard of the few states with the courage and common sense to not just face history or simply report it, but to quickly and efficiently amend it.
After all, won’t a better, happier, more noble past lead us to a better and holier future.
I think the Jim Bobs and the Jean Paul Billy Bobs of the world may be onto something profound.